Alien Heist

They were in the control room of Arcis Industries. George wasn't very happy.

"You SOLD MY BOAT?!?!" He screamed the last part right in Marvin's face. 

"Yes. I did. We needed the money." This didn't even begin to calm him down.

"But my boat... It was a classic! A 50's Valorian Limited CarShip. It worked like a charm too!" Bragging seemed to make George calmer.... until he suddenly remembered that he'd probably never see the boat again. "It was worth a FORTUNE!"

"It sure was. But we didn't need it after we got our hands on the paragraph--"

"I don't care about that. You SOLD MY FRIGGING BOAT!" George pointed his index finger at Marvin.

"Wow wow wow, take it easy now." Marvin backed away, both hands in the air, palms flat out and raised.

"Give me one good reason why I shouldn't kill you." Marvin breathed hard, trying to remember something. It was just at the tip of his tongue, yet he couldn't QUITE remember it. A few seconds went by.

"Are you gonna say something, or should I just get it over with?" said George, and Marvin remembered.

"In that moment, I knew, with out a doubt, that I have a common comma problem, and that he would most likely kill me." Marvin spoke the entire sentence out loud. It was from his favorite book. 

George fell to the ground, lying there motionless. He was an advanced android, complete with his own personality and thoughts, yes, but after the Android Riot of '35, all of them came with a custom off-key, which could be changed at any time. Marvin had never used it before, but he was starting to see the necessity of it, especially when they could turn against their owner like that...

PRRRIIIPPPP.

Marvin turned around, fast. 

"Uh oh."

The sealed door in front of him went BOOM! In walked Drool, complete with his angel-like wings, tentacle-y body and a completely circular head. He was probably the vilest alien in the whole galaxy, and it didn't exactly help that he had his own private army. Drool was, in addition to being a mob-boss, quite the collector, and had lately been fascinated with early American history. Drool had pooled on the first paragraph describing the Delaware crossing. Once Marvin found that out, he'd stolen Drool's collection of them using George's CarShip. Marvin was particularly proud that he and George had managed to steal them all without Drool even noticing. This was an even more impressive feat when you think about what Drool would do to them once he found out. Making a long story short; he'd go nuclear. And that was before he figured out what they were planning to do with the paragraph.

"Hello!" Marvin waved.

"Hi Marvin" Drool looked around the room, judging the situation. Marvin couldn't help but notice that he didn't have his private army with him. He considered this a small victory, mostly because it ment that he had a small chance of escaping or, even better, killing Drool. Still, if this had been a game of Poker, Marvin had gone "all-in" on the "being very dead when this was over"-option. This was Drool after all. 

Drool turned to Marvin. "What's really going on here?"

Marvin sighed. "We're destroying your science laboratory. Well, it's not actually YOUR science laboratory, but you have invested in it. And you had all the shut-down codes. Very clever, by the way; to use something as old as the Delaware Crossing."

Drool smiled. It wasn't pretty. "Thank you." Then he turned serious, while Marvin weighed his options for escape. "But why are you doing this? I know you're not working for any type of Government. You're criminals! You have nothing to gain from this." Marvin studied Drool, wondering what lie he would have to come up with to make him believe. Sadly, Marvin had never been an imaginative person. He decided to go with the truth.

"The truth? We don't want you controlling everything, threatening everyone with these vile beasts. Eventually, they'll destroy us all."

Drool smiled. "I know. Isn't it fantastic?"

"No. It's not. It's like something out of Lovecraft. You know, "That is not dead which can eternal lie, yet with strange aeons even death may die."?" Marvin was proud that he'd managed to sneak that in. It was, after all, from his favorite author.

Drool doesn't connect the dots. "I don't know see how that applies to our situation. Can you elaborate?" Marvin just smiles. Behind him, George rises, seemingly from the dead. For every off-key, there was a boot-key. And Marvin had just used it.

George knocked Drool out flat, and stuck his thumb into his circular head.

"You okay George?" Marvin was a bit worried. "Not gonna kill me or anything?"

George smiled. "No. Just needed it to look convincing enough for the cameras."

Marvin sighed a relief. "You know, for a second there, I thought you were serious."

"I wasn't." George finished the download, pulling out his thumb from Drool's head. 

"We got what we need?" Marvin asked.

"Yes." 

"Great! Right. Ok so now we need to redirect the plasma flow to the quantum transducers so that the magnolocks will unlock the docking clamps and we can get to the aft quasar... just turn that handle. Ok?" Marvin pointed at a handle. George turned it.

The floor beneath them opened, and revealed a bomb shelter. George dropped Drool's body down into the bomb shelter. "Alright" said Marvin, and pushed the button beside the handle George turned. A computerized voice said; "Give command." George began to read. He read the entire first paragraph describing the Delaware Crossing in Nivius, Drool's mother tongue. Then the computerized voice could be heard once again, this time saying; "Executing Command". Marvin was very pleased with how this whole situation had turned out. "Another fine job done!" George turned to Marvin. "You still sold my boat" he said, and pushed Marvin down the bomb shelter, before turning the handle back to its original position. "Hey, hey help me up George! This isn't funny!" Marvin was desperate; he looked worryingly over at Drool's unconscious body. "You get me out of here, George! Pull that handle, or I'll turn you off!" George smiled. "I'd like to see you try." Marvin was stunned. "In that moment, I knew, with out a doubt, that I have a common comma problem, and that he would most likely--" The floor above them closed. "kill me." Marvin finished. "Oh god. Oh no. WHY?!"

Above the floor George walked out, ready to collect his huge paycheck from Tyverion Laboratories, a rivaling science company. He had a lot of adventures to experience, starting with getting his CarShip back.

Marvin wasn't very happy. He didn't like being betrayed. When he got out of this bomb shelter, George was going to pay. Though if this had been a game of poker, Marvin would've bet on "if", not "when". Still. He was getting out of here. He HAD to. Drool was starting to wake up. "Where am I?" 

"We're in the bomb shelter under the Arcis Industries Control Room. Though this is likely all that's left of Arcis." Marvin sat down and sighed. "We're probably drifting around in space right now." Drool scratched the spot where George had stuck his thumb in. "I take it you managed to activate the destruction process?" Marvin nodded. "George learned your mother tongue by plugging into you and downloading it. I attempted to figure out what he was saying, but honestly, I am not sure the sounds he was making could have been considered language. No offense."

"None taken." 

"You'll probably have a headache, but don't worry, it'll be gone in a few minutes." Drool looked at Marvin. "Wait a minute - why are you down here?" Marvin's expression darkened. "I sold George's CarShip. He didn't like that." Drool laughed. "He BETRAYED you? Oh man. That is brilliant."

Marvin didn't need the irony pointed out to him. "Shut up." he said, and Drool stopped laughing. "Remember the first thing I taught you?"

"What, never to trust a criminal?" Marvin looked at Drool. "Oh." Drool smiled. "Gotta say you screwed the pooches on that one." They were silent for a bit. Drool looked around the room; suddenly, his eyes caught a green box. 

"Hey, you wanna play some Scrabble?" 

Being locked in a 20ft by 15ft bomb shelter with the world champion Scrabble player is not as fun some people might think it is. This goes double when the game is in Nivius, you have no idea what the letters mean and the other player kinda wants to kill you. But not really. That would've made his life in the shelter too damn dull.